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What an enticing thought . . . being a captivating woman having a captivating life.

I've long been enthralled by the word captivating, so today I decided I'd research definitions. The Merriam-Webster dictionary definition was my favourite:

Captivating: Charmingly or irrestistibly appealing.

Ooooh, doesn't that just tickle your lust for life!

We can be captivated by a brilliant mind.
Captivated by beauty.
Captivated by a fascinating thought.
Captivated by a piece of art.
Captivated by a subject.

And we can be captivating women.

Delving further into the definition, I was drawn to several aspects that I would agree beautifully define a captivating woman:

She is . . .

  • charming and engaging
  • confident
  • an uplifting and positive influence
  • passionate
  • kind-hearted
  • genuine and true to herself
  • interested and interesting

Wouldn't you just love to be all of those things?

Then I got to wondering, how could we apply those enticing aspects to creating a captivating life?

Perhaps cultivating a life full of captivating aspects is the secret to becoming a captivating woman.

So the question becomes, how can you make your own life charming and irresistibly appealing to you?

So here are my 6 chic ways to create a captivating life:

1. Write yourself a captivating story.

Your whole life is like a story. A creative author or film director could take your life and transform it into a captivating account of love, loss, adventure, struggle, delight and self-discovery. It’s up to you to make it into the heroine’s story, one of rising above, of elevating perspectives, of experiencing contrast all around you and using it to master the art of self-awareness and ultimately self-alignment.

It's up to you to make your story captivating by the way you choose to experience and perceive the various aspects of it. And by the way in which you infuse it daily with irresistible touches that make your heart sing.

So, number one . . . Make a writer’s decision to design a captivating life story. 

2. Be captivating in your outlook

A positive, optimistic outlook attracts opportunities for fun, change and joy! How fun is it to be around someone who focuses on the negative, sees everything unwanted with the eyes of a victim, and panics at the smallest hiccup? Not very.

Accepting that those thoughts and emotions exist, acknowledging that it’s ok to feel them, and then choosing to consider more inviting ways to look at situations is a defining aspect of creating a captivating outlook.

You’ll be far more appealing to yourself, and that’s gotta be a good thing! After all, you get to hang out with yourself every moment of your life. So you may as well entice yourself into being you by viewing your own personal universe through the eyes of charm, delight and possibility.

Yes, even when you’re feeling crappy. Which happens to all of us. Even the most naturally optimistic. When you know you’re feeling off, simply reassure yourself that it’s ok to feel crappy sometimes, it’s ok to wobble off all the good-feels, you’re ok, and you’re preparing to anticipate delightfully surprising, good-feeling moments of happiness to come.

It's a choice, you see? A choice to feel captivated by your life by seeing and feeling it that way, intentionally.

So, chic tip #2 is to create a captivating outlook.

3. Adorn your life with captivating style

Oh là là, this one can be so fun!

I’ve discovered that one can never underestimate the power of approaching one’s every day with style.

Be intentional about how you dress, how you decorate your home, how you serve your meals, how you move, how you stand and sit and communicate.

Entice yourself into your own life!

What feels irresistible to you? Consider things like colour, fragrance, texture, taste. Consider moving with grace or energy or dynamism or elegance. What captivates you? Add some of that to the way you style your life.

We know that it’s all an inside job, right? As in, all the change that we want to see comes from our thoughts and feelings and is then created and projected outwards. Well guess what?! What we choose to do with the outside world can totally uplift our inner world, making way for more captivating thought and emotions! It’s so true. Try it out.

Add some colour or fragrance to your outfit, pick a flower from the garden to place in your bathroom, create a beautiful space to prepare your coffee or tea and make it a charming ritual, breathe-in the morning, put up new artwork (simply print out an inspiring image that you find online and place it in a pretty frame, use to design your little heart out and create your own originals!).

I invite you to be aware of how your space affects your feelings, and be sure to add the elements that spark your joy!

Make your own living space captivating. Display books that you’ve read and thoroughly enjoyed; they may reinspire those good feelings. And do the same with your person. Style yourself, just for fun! Add a belt or scarf or earrings to captivate your sense of fun or elegance in your outfit. Spritz some perfume on your pillow to elevate your bedtime.

This #3 chic tip will really start to flame your captivating skills! Give it a try.

4. Surround yourself with captivating people and places and influences.

Go to the places that inspire you.
Put your favourite books on display; remember how you felt when you read them and allow that ambiance to infuse your surroundings.
Become involved in expansive conversations that challenge your current thoughts and broaden your perspectives.
Be around people you admire, who lift you up and inspire you to grow.

If there are not people immediately in your life who captivate you, find them in movies and books, find captivating social accounts to follow so that your feed lights up with irresistible words and images. Be intentional about what you watch and read and listen to. How does what you consume make you feel? Does it captivate you?

That’s what you want to be aware of . . . how things make you feel. Then as much as possible, in both the tiny moments and the expansive experiences, allow your environment to captivate you.

5. Be intensely interested in your life

Have you ever been so absorbed in a subject that the rest of the world seems to be blocked out and time seems non-existent?
It’s an incredibly satisfying feeling, isn’t it?
You feel irresistibly compelled to read and research and absorb. Maybe you write and take notes. Maybe what you learn transforms how you see your world, or an aspect of your world, and compels you to make changes.

So imagine having that level of interest in your own life.
The sense of curiosity and fascination.
The learning.
The never-ending, ever-evolving mini transformations that render your life captivating.

Choose to be fascinated with the way things work out. What have you been thinking lately, and how has that been reflected in the circumstances that surround you? What happens when you think differently? How long does it seem to take for your circumstances to reflect your thoughts. What are you focusing on inside your mind? What images keep popping up? How are you enhancing your days? How are you bringing your desired reality into your now? How can you live as your fabulous future self now?

Once you become curious about how you feel, how you function, what lights you up, what environments stimulate you, your life becomes like a canvas that you can decorate however you choose. You’ll begin to really notice what you love, and then you can intentionally create it as you style you life.

Design your world to harmonise with and enhance your nature, your preferences, your desires. To reflect the essence of YOU.

So, chic tip # 5 is to be intensely, time-stoppingly interested in your own life and how you’re influencing it. That way, you can begin to make deliberate choices about what captivates you and how you might begin to inspire yourself to feel like a captivating woman in your own world.

6. Be true to yourself as you design your world.


This is one of my biggest lessons this year; to be unapologetically ME in every situation. Not always the easiest thing, as we can allow ourselves to be sucked into other people’s vibes and feel uncomfortable and even embarrassed about stating or experiencing or being what we love.

Oh, but when you do it, when you truly own yourself and the things that you love and the life that you choose to create, you allow yourself to be captivated by your yourself.

And that’s when you discover true freedom.

When you no longer need to be captivated by other people, or to be captivating for other people, you find true happiness and contentment. And then you become a perfect match to others who are captivated by their own lives, and you can rendezvous with those others and experience the joy of two or more happy, content, captivated humans bumbling around joyfully together.

It really does sound delightfully captivating, doesn’t it?

mini swirl

IN conclusion,  I think we may have stumbled upon the real secret . . .

You want to feel captivating in, and captivated by, your own life, rather than focusing on developing the qualities of a captivating woman.

And before you know it, without even trying, you have become her.

If these chic tips have captured your imagination, you might like to spark a month of captivating thoughts and experiences with my Happiness Moments – a 30-day Happiness Experience with inspired acts of fun and sparks of joy to slip into your days and ignite your own happiness impulse. It's an email experience, where each day for 30 days you’ll receive a beautiful email with that day’s Happiness Moment.

I actually proposed this idea to my original CLUB Cocorico members some time ago, and they loved it so much; they were all messaging me in great detail about how they were inserting the moments into their days and how it truly uplifted their emotions and perspective.

Natalia said, “OMG, what a month! I'm going to miss all the daily happiness moments. Thank you for enlightening our lives.”

And Elena said “Just got the message for Day 1. I am already happier!
I was smiling while reading it.”

Soooo, now I’ve made it available to everyone!
Just $15 Aussie dollars gives you 30 days of joy!

You’ll find details of the Happiness Moments experience HERE. 

Thanks for reading, and may you burst into your new day with confidence, style and joy!

judith x

your native language is your superpower book free chapter

A 30-Day Happiness Experience
Inspired acts of fun and sparks of joy to slip into your day and ignite your own happiness impulse.

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"I love this #16!  Even my daughter was dancing with me in the kitchen; difficult to resist!  Feeling happy."

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